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♥whoa. | Monday, September 1, 2008
HELLOO EVERYONE.
tab here.
well, i dont know what i'm thinking right now. i've got a lot of studying to do, which i really dont feel like facing, though i'll eventually come to the realisation that i have to. and then there's this big fat thing that'll be on my mind FOREVER. yes, i'm quite distressed abt it. i know i shouldnt be cos its all in His hands, but i'm only human arent i? but that shouldnt be an excuse cos i'm a human who's got the Almighty God on her side.
well, i told angel and melia and now the rest of you, i'm going for the mission trip to chiang mai this november. the deadline was ytd. so i had to make my decision. no, it wasnt the deadline that drove me to making the decision, but i guess, now i can say for CERTAIN that God really was behind that decision. typing this out now really makes it seem alot nicer and easier to handle. if God brings u to it, He'll bring you thru it wont He? yes, He will.
i'm not making a huge drama out of this seemingly small thing...really. i just..dont know what i'm getting myself into, thats all. the biggest fear factor i guess is the fact that i dont even know who i'll be going with. i've just been secretly hoping some other youth signed up for the trip quietly too, but i'm quite sure that's not gonna happen.
so well.. let me tell you guys the reason i'm doing this. i know its not the 'youth mission trip' and its really near youth camp too which means i'll probably not be as involved this year? i dunno. but well, i guess i just had to do this. its not really an explanation i know but i dont know how else to put it. when i was first announced, i looked at it in the bulletin and just said out loud, to florence i think, that i wanted to go for this. i made pathetic attempts of praying about it. journalled about it once or twice then just conveniently forgot abt it. i guess now that i think about it, i was afraid to make such a commitment, esp since it was to the biggest, most important guy in this world, in my life. God.
so yes, when i found out ytd that the deadline was ytd, i knew i had to make the decision and by the end of the sermon, i was convinced. it was a spur of the moment decision, as i've said. but i guess i was really encouraged by the speaker. All her little stories, no matter how strange, how unheard of, she was obviously telling the truth and that truth was that God was always there. He didn’t leave or forsake her. Ever.
And that was my reassurance you could say. I was going with unknown ppl, alone. But I knew who was always with me. I had never done this before. But I just know He will help and guide me. I’ve always prayed for an opportunity and here’s one, right smack in my face. If I don’t take it now, why bother praying in future?
Alright, enough heavy thinking for now. Night guys! Just rmb who we’re living for and we’ll be alright :) love.
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